Inspired by ‘Dear Abby’ (which my mother loved to read), this page is dedicated to giving the general public a place to seek spiritual advice on everyday problems. Submit your questions below. If selected, Ashley will channel her dearly departed mother, Ann, for some spiritual guidance. Answers will be posted right here on this page. The Ask Ann Advice Column will be updated every few weeks. Delays can be expected during times of my events or when I’m traveling.

Questions submitted can be on any subject where you are needing motherly advice. Some examples might be: “I made a mistake and my friend won’t forgive me.” “My husband wants to move and I don’t. Who should get their way?” “My neighbors dog won’t stop barking. Do I confront them?”

All forms submitted become the property of Ashley Wong/Made by a Real Witch™ and may be edited/shortened for the purpose of sharing. Submissions will not receive a personal response outside of this website. Personal information such as your last name, phone number, and email address won’t be shared publicly. If you would like your first name to be kept private as well, please mention it and we will select something different.

In memory of Ann Harrison 1939-2023

Dear Ann,

My best friend and I had a falling out over a dumb mistake that I made. I apologized and she knows that it came from the heart. That was 7 years ago. To this day, she continues to bring it up and every time she does, I feel small and ashamed. I feel pressured to continue to apologize to her - even though I’ve apologized repeatedly. I feel like I’ve paid my dues and we should move on. How do I get her to let it go? I don’t want to lose her friendship, but I also don’t want to keep having this same conversation.

Thank you in advance.

Exhausted Bestie

Dear Exhausted Bestie,

For your own emotional well-being, it is time to lay this problem to rest. Address the situation with your friend in a calm and assertive manner. Tell her how you feel when she brings up the past mistake you made and make her aware of how much it hurts you to continuously be reminded of it. Set boundaries by explaining that dwelling on the past is not productive and actually makes the situation worse. Encourage open communication and focus on the present or the road ahead. Don’t apologize for the mistake again and remember that a true friend should support and uplift you, rather than bringing you down with reminders of past errors. You are not alone in this. By holding this over your head for 7 years, your friend has clearly made some mistakes too.

If she still can’t let it go after all that, get a dog.

~ Ann

Dear Ann,

My elderly neighbor is mean. She doesn’t like me. We’ve never had any kind of issue. I’m a respectful neighbor - don’t violate noise laws, take care of my yard, I’m polite, etc. etc. My problem is that recently she acquired a small dog and she walks her dog over to my front lawn to do its business, but doesn’t pick up after it. How should I handle this? I’m beyond frustrated.

Dear Beyond Frustrated,

This situation stinks - literally! It is time to stop being polite. Your disrespectful neighbor is pushing your buttons deliberately and you need to stand up for yourself. Start documenting/recording any instances of the dog defecating on your lawn to support your case - as you may need some evidence to back up your statements. Then address the issue directly with your neighbor. In a calm - yet firm - manner, ask your neighbor to clean up after her pet. If the problem persists, consider installing a fence or motion-activated sprinkler system to deter the dog from coming onto your property. Lastly, contact local authorities or animal control for advice. Most cities have laws around this type of thing.

Remember that it is not the dogs fault that it has a crappy owner (pun intended). This is a people problem.

Best of luck!

~ Ann

Dear Ann,

My brother is 77 years young. In his sleep he calls out the most haunting cry - like my father used to do. It sounds like my brother is fighting with a spirit but he doesn’t remember when I wake him up. My father never remembered his dreams either. What can it be?

Bev

Dear Bev,

Your brother is fighting an internal conflict with himself. These are subconscious memories that are floating to the surface of mistakes that he made in his younger years and how those actions impacted the people around him. The 1970’s is coming up. Your brother has regrets that he’s struggling to come to terms with. Some of his memories are repressed. He fears judgement on the other side when his time comes.

It is important for your brother to know that everyone makes mistakes. That is how we learn and grow. Past events cannot be erased. They are what they are and he needs to find a way to accept that. The best way for your brother to move past this would be to sincerely apologize to the people he hurt and forgive himself for making choices that he wouldn’t necessarily make today.

I’m wishing your family well.

~ Ann

Dear Ann,

I have been separated from my husband for a few years, and just waiting for our divorce to be finalized. I miss him so much. Will he ever reach out to me again?

LouAnn

Dear LouAnn,

I’m sorry you’re hurting.  Endings that are forced upon us can be hard to grapple with. It is natural to want your ex to return, but it is also important to prioritize your own happiness and well-being rather than solely focusing on the possibility of reconciliation. You can't control his actions and you don't want to waste precious years of your life waiting for him to 'possibly' change his mind. This is a period of growth for you. Focus on self-care and building a fulfilling life for yourself. Remember that you are strong enough to thrive on your own...and perhaps you are meant to meet someone new. Trust that everything happens for a reason, and have faith that the right path will reveal itself in time.

~ Ann

Dear Ann,

I am wondering if you have any insight on my current stressful living situation? Any advice would be truly appreciated.

Beverly

Dear Beverly

You are being tested at this time. Your challenge is not what the situation is. Your challenge is how you choose to navigate through it. Your words, choices, and actions are defining your path ahead and where that path will lead. My advice for navigating through high stress as a mature woman would be to prioritize self-care and mental well-being. You cannot change others, but you can control how you react to them. Set boundaries where needed and communicate your needs clearly and firmly. Seek support from trusted friends or professionals if needed. Trust your instincts and make decisions that are best for you in the long run. I’m wishing you well on whatever path you choose.

Sincerely,

Ann

Dear Ann,

My question is about my kids. I feel like I let them down in life by not giving them the love and support they need. This is all due to how I was raised. Will they do well in life despite my short comings? What should I do differently?

Sincerely,

Bonita

Hello Bonita,

Do not be too hard on yourself. As a mother, we always strive to do our best for our children, but we are only human. It is natural to have moments of doubt and regret, but remember that it is never too late to make things right. Past events can't be changed, but you are in full control over where things go from here. Tell your children that you are sorry for the things you did wrong and that you want nothing but the best for them in life. Put actions behind your words by being a loving, supportive mother moving forward. As for your children, remember that every child has their own unique journey and potential. Show them the best way forward by leading by example. Trust in their individual strengths and abilities, and have faith that they will find their way. If there are deep emotional wounds, consider professional counselling as a potential tool for healing. Let unconditional love be your guide and inspiration. 

Sincerely,

Ann

Dear Ann,

I am currently unemployed. I am wondering if a job is in my future or is this going to be my new life?

Stephanie

Hello Stephanie,

Keeping a positive outlook when you feel like the Universe doesn't have your back is hard, but ultimately the answer to your question lies within you and whether you choose to persevere or give up. Each is a choice and no one can make that choice but you. My advice for you is to stay strong and focus on your strengths and skills. Visualize yourself in a fulfilling job that aligns with your qualifications and your interests. Trust in the universe to guide you towards the right opportunities - whether they be connected to work or school. Expect some setbacks along the way - life is rarely perfect - but if you are patient and persistent you will eventually get to where you need to go.

Ann

Submit Your question

This page is dedicated to the memory of Ashley’s mother, Ann. Born in Merseyside England in 1939, Ann learned to Read Palms, Tea Leaves, & Playing Cards from her mother, grandmother, & great aunts in England in the 1940's. She then passed those skills on to her daughter throughout the 1970's & 80's.

Ann was a mother of four, had three grandchildren, and three great grandchildren. She lived the final years of her life in a nursing home in Northern British Columbia. While there, Ann enjoyed reading Tea Leaves for other residents during afternoon tea. Ann’s Fortune Telling skills became so popular with residents and staff that she was set up with a permanent Tea Leaf Reading Station next to the gift shop where eager advice seekers would stand in line to get their fortunes told for $20.

Ann on her wedding day in 1961. Gone but not forgotten. May she rest in peace.

P.S. My mother would have loved this.

Older Posts

Dear Ann,

My daughter is getting married next summer and wanted me to try on horrible dresses that she picked out for me. I didn't like anything she chose, so I went behind her back and bought a beautiful black outfit with an amazing lacey shawl. It’s lovely and fits me perfectly. When I showed it to her she got very upset. We argued and haven't spoken since. My husband and I are paying for this wedding. Am I wrong to think that I should get to decide what I wear to my own daughters wedding? There has been no consideration for my feelings.

Diane

Hello Diane,

As a mother, it can be difficult to be asked to wear an outfit that you may not feel comfortable in to your daughter's wedding. Neither one of you wants to cringe when looking back at the photos...or have the memory of such a special day be tainted by arguments. However, it is important to remember that this day is about celebrating your daughter's happiness - not about your appearance. She has likely exhausted herself trying to coordinate the details of color schemes and overall look and doesn't want things to clash. Trying to please everyone is hard...there is always someone who is unhappy with the choices that a young bride makes...but ultimately, it is her wedding. Communicate thoughtfully and honestly with your daughter about your concerns, but let her have the final say. In moments like these, it is crucial to prioritize your daughter's wishes and make her feel special on her big day. Remember that your love and support are what truly matter, not the outfit you wear. Embrace this opportunity to show your daughter that you are there for her no matter what, even if it means wearing an outfit that may not be your first, second, or third choice. Your presence and love will be the most beautiful thing at the wedding.

Ann

Dear Ann, 

My adult son is battling addiction. It has spun way out of control. I've done everything I can but he refuses to listen. I could use some advice.

Paula

Hello Sweetheart, 

I knew you in life and always held a place in my heart for you. I loved you like a daughter and I always will. It must be incredibly hard to watch your son battle addiction. As you know, I lost my youngest son to a drug overdose when he was twenty-five. Looking back, I always wished I had done more to help. As a mother, our instinct is to protect and nurture our children, no matter how old they are. Remember that you are not alone. Seek support from professionals who can guide you on how to best support your son while also taking care of yourself. It is important to set boundaries and practice self-care in order to stay strong for the both of you. Keep communicating with him, showing love and compassion, and never give up hope for his recovery. Remember, you are a source of strength and comfort for him during this difficult time...but you don't have to go it alone. Help is a phone call away.

Ann

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